Is it happiness or “successful happiness“that I am really on the pursuit of?
Am I unsuccessfully pursing a shared dream…a social idea… a cultural vision, of happiness…?
Could individualizing success, clarify my journey and increase the outcome of achieving my tailored pursuit?
If successful happiness is being successful because your happy…What brings you joy?
Till next time
One Love ♥
This is one of my favorite pics of me…You cant see, but I’m wearing this fly sailor jumper and giving plenty personality as I crossed my legs with my hand on my hip!
This throwback inspired some reflection, as I am faced with the reality that my daughter is about to turn ONE. Along with the fact that my high school teachers are currently my employees (crazy weird). Whoever created the saying “time flies” I just want you to know that that’s a serious understatement!
When I look back, I’m thankful that I’m not who I was, blessed for who I am and grateful that the best me is yet to be!
Taking time to reflect and analyze my life, has been transformative in my growth. I am determined to not live my life in vain. I try not to value things as good or bad, but just as experiences that shape my understanding of life …As long as I am open to receiving them.
What was your last reflection about?
So today was a chill normal day…Wished my brother a happy 26th B-day. Purchased natural hair dolls for my daughters b-day. Worked my lovely 9-5 then headed to my sisters for a quick hair touch up before some spiritual enlightenment (aka bible study).
While I was at my sissies I was talking to my niece about her first day of 1st grade. She was telling me that she was the only brown girl in her class and that she wanted to be white 😦
In a seemingly unsuccessful brief attempt, I tried to explain to her that her skin was beautiful because it has history, it had a story and its a blessing to not look like everyone else.
It was a huge reminder of how important SELF LOVE education is …and how its never to early to start!
SN: On a lighter note…This post helps me rationalize spending way to much on them gorgeous natural hair dolls for my mini me lbs.
What makes your brown beautiful??
Sooo I started working at my old high school in June and its been crazy surreal having my old teachers as co-workers. It puts time into perspective…Seems like just yesterday I was a student in these same hallways stressin about what I would wear for the first day.
Even though I wasn’t worried about my fit, I did have new hair I was excited about 🙂 I had my sister do these sexy lock extensions I have been wanting forever. I got them as a protective style for my fro I’ve been neglecting. BUT I’m kind of in love and thinking about making them permeant …just a bit smaller.
For everyone that started school today or tomorrow I hope you have a great first week!
This week I started refining the focus of my blog, which included adding a Lala’s mama page. My daughters name is Alana and bettering myself everyday so that she can have an example to look up to, be proud of and learn from is my mission in life.
One of my inspirations is Ms. Jada Pinkett Smith (the whole Smith family really) because of her poise, wisdom and fearless approach to life. With the Huxtable’s not far behind, the Pinkett-Smith family is truly an inspiring example for me.
Watch this video to see why…No explanation needed….I was sobbing within 1 minute btw. ENJOY
Be love, seek truth, find purpose
In the words of my girl India “Life is a journey not a destination”
I last shared about how my “30 Day Self love Challenge ” was starting to contradict its purpose of obtaining wellness…(balance) to my life! So I did some reflecting and the result manifested “The Journey”
Everyday I will send you a video explaining the next step in the journey. This will provide you with enough options to know what works for you!
1:What is Self- love
2 : Reflect on the current you
3. Assessing your current and ideal life balance
4 : Analyze your life baggage
5. My God
5.Make an action map “A goal is a dreams with an action plan”
6. Baggage to blessings
7. Values and Beliefs
8: Practice Accountability
9. Practice gratefulness (Spiritual tools)
10. Pay attention (Purpose tools 110)
11. Affirm yourself: (Daily mantras)
12. Reflection on process (Share thoughts from the journey)
13. *FOCUS Plan*
The Journey: Guidelines
- You can start at any time (If you join on late just look at old videos and go at your own pace)
- Ask for help if you don’t understand something,
- Pay attention to what resonates with you and what dosent…question why?
- If for whatever catastrophic reason you miss a day or just cant complete a day, continue on the journey
- Adapt the journey to your lifestyle
Commin back from horseback ridding with 20 plus church kids yesterday, I felt both tired and youthful!
All I wanted to do when I got home was watch a movie and relax…I thought about watching my fav coming of age story “Grease” but decided to check out Netflix instead. I ended up watching two rights of passage movies by chance.
The first was “lol” and the other was “Girl in progress“
Both films took me back to my high-school days and made me a lil grateful to be past that confusing period in my life… but It also made me feel for my youngness who are in the midst of that very intense, important and impact-full time.
I believe were in a day in age where especially young black girls aren’t able to fully experience and grow from this time because they have too many adult issues that they are dealing with….This often seems to be the manifestation of their parents lacking the very thing they are depriving their children from (love, attention, stability, security, reassurance, support,…)
A family cycle that leads to a life long journey of trying to fill a void with temporary solutions. After the movie I was cleaning listening to to my pandora and this very relevant song came on and inspired this post.
“Then one day I just asked her
“Why you always give your ass up?
I mean damn these hoes get paid
All you do is get laid, this shit don’t add up.”
She said, “Tip, all I wanna do is feel love
Even if I know it ain’t real love
Even if I know a n**** only finna hit it
And then never call back, I still f***”
Commit to knowing the-self and loving the-self …Easier said then done right??? Well from what I hear nothing worth having comes easy.
ARE YOU WORTH IT??? If so join me on the “Self -Love Journey“!
Point A (where we are right now)
I ♥ Wellness Wheels (btw)
This is how my joint is looking right now …well not exactly, but it’s not balanced! The goal of living well is to get each area as balanced as possible- meaning no area is sacrificed for another. (The areas can be tweaked to fit your life)
Point B (Where we want to be)
THIS is what we are all really striving for….This is what the pursuit of happiness looks like. For the next 30 days I am going to start small on making adjustments in my life to help me ultimately achieve and maintain a healthy balanced life. Join me if you dare, the more the merrier!
*SN. “The Pursuit of Happyness” Is one of my favorite movies by the way
Whats your wellness wheel looking like?
So today I decided I’m staring this 30 Day Challenge! The point is to hold me accountable to being the best example I can be for my daughter. Through my passion for motivating youth, I stress that knowing and being your best self is the golden rule to life….And uh since thats a pretty strong claim to make, I need to commit to practicing what I preach!
BOOT CAMP TIME BABY!!!
Pheno’s 30 Day Challenge (P3DC):
- Setting Goals using the wellness wheel to maintain balance
- Using life as a classroom
- Constant assessment
- Daily reflection
- Overal evaluation
Thats like the super basic version…But
if WHEN completed, the results will be revolutionary in my life… Especially when I plan to do this every other month for at least the next 365 days! To really understand what Im talking about just get to know me, as I get to know me for the next 30!
P3DC Begins (last nights impromptu video lol) …Don’t judge 🙂
Im still getting use to this blogging thing…I think I over think my potential post which results in no post at all 😦 So here is something light for the overdue.
Todays Black Girl who Rocks is Ms. Ella Varner. When asked during an interview about something surprising thing that people don’t know about her she revealed that she had been severely bullied. Saying that “people were mean to me most of my life and told me that I sucked”. Her way of dealing with it was to go home and write songs .
“So Fly” is one of my songs where I wrote about an actual situation where I was never going to get this guy’s attention because I didn’t look a certain way at the time. Since that song I have lost weight but I feel like a song like that, everybody, not just women, can relate to. Feeling like you’re not enough no matter what size you are. So if people picked on me or called me fat, I would just make up songs about it.
For all the brown beauties that felt like their looks feel short! Here’s to you boo, because there’s comfort in feeling like your not alone.
Can you relate??